Dear Sir,
Greetings and well met. It has come to our attention that you desire a change in your life. It seems you have come to some sort of conclusion that sitting on the couch is no longer desirable. We do have the ability to provide you with a more comfortable couch if you so desire. Our team of dietitians are willing to continue the Coca Cola regimen, followed by the fried Chicken and Doritos. We do see here that Taco continues to be your favorite, and can request the late night diet of Frosted Flakes if you so choose.
Exercise is a bit overrated, I mean you have a busy schedule of work 9-5 followed by resting on the couch from 6-7. I would suggest relying on your wife to do most of the rearing of the children as you have that extra level of video game to accomplish. We don't see why you would want to do anything different. Just disregard that pain in your chest I hear wheezing is "cool" with today's modern adult. With your Cerebral Palsy the last thing you would want to do is *shudder* exercise.
We do hope you reconsider your desire to change, if you should desire come back we are waiting for you.
Best Regards
Your Excuses LLC
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