Space Toilet

Hello there!  Up a little early today, my legs are barking and I cant really get back to sleep when this happens so here we are.

This is the Summer of VBS or Vacation Bible School in case you were thinking of Very Big Sausages.  I think we are on number 4 or maybe 5 with the kids.  I enjoy the stories and smiles my kids come back with and the endless stream of crafts.  At the closing ceremony on Monday, all of my kids occupied a row with their cousins.  I watched as they twirled and smiled and looked back at me.  Collin seemed more interested in assaulting Katrina, and my nephew Christian enjoyed when the worker held him.  Summer is also the time when I view online photos of other peoples adventures.  Whether it is people outdoors grilling, traveling or crafting, I get jealous.

JEALOUS!!???  How dare you?!!!

I am almost convinced that my greatest enemy is not my aches and pains but time.

I sat in that back row and looked at each of my children, growing looking different in a variety of ways already than last year when we went to Disney World.  My girls are more interested in videos about songs than drawing a picture.  They are more interested in people who visit then giving me a hug goodbye for work.  The children who were at the top of the steps cheering for me as i were a conquering hero throw clothes down now so I can throw them in the laundry room.  Time...it marches on.

By no means do I feel I am not blessed,  as crazy as the last 8 years or so has been it has been so worth it.  Would I change anything?  More pictures of them as babies, maybe some of those really fancy ones where everyone is standing on the beach wearing matching clothes, or with my shirt off cradling each child in my arms as the sun hits us just right, horses galloping behind us.  Yeah we are also on a beach in New Zealand  Also fireworks....wait er nevermind, collin would find the fireworks.

I am by no means perfect, my parenting skills are a hodge podge of ideas and notions and advice I have accumulated.  I pray, try to pay attention.  Erin worries that my head will be in the sad (hehe I like that better then sand) once the girls start talking about boys or the period that does not come at the end of this sentence.  Time still marching on

Then katrina asked me to lay with her, and off to the bunk bed I went.  Fun fact, bunk beds are no longer comfortable, I may have some internal bleeding.  I rubbed her hair kissed her and prayed with her then fell asleep.  Time only seems to slightly slow the few moments after a great tragedy so you can attempt to get your bearings, but those moments before i drifted off I was reminded of the first day I saw my girls.

So what is the answer?  Still looking and will be revising as I go but for now

Love them
Listen to them
Help them
Encourage Them
Teach them

and stop looking at other peoples lives and live my own best I can.